Tips For Being Present
If you find yourself wondering how to be more present in the moment, you’re not alone. During pregnancy, you’ll often find yourself thinking about the future once your baby joins you earthside. During postpartum, you might find yourself thinking about life before your baby or even trying to juggle the many hats you wear as a new parent.
Even more frustrating that not being able to stay present is hearing someone tell you “enjoy it while it lasts”. Why? You might be so preoccupied mentally that you can’t even focus on what “it” is in the moment. So now you might be wondering, how can you practice being more present?
During Pregnancy
Pregnancy can be such an exciting time - you’re growing a life, adding to your family, and preparing to welcome your little one earthside. All of these same reasons that can be so exciting can also make it difficult to stay present. It’s easy for your mind to be focused on the future, focused on after they are born.
What you might not think about is how short pregnancy is. (Yes, the last month of pregnancy often feels like it’s 300 days itself) You will only have that one pregnancy for nine months of your life compared to the many years of your life you will live alongside your children.
Here are 3 ways you can help refocus your mind during pregnancy:
Put your hands on your belly and feel the rise and fall of your breath. This sense of touch can feel so grounding.
Talk to your baby. In the third trimester, your baby can start to hear inside the womb. By talking to your baby, you’re helping establish a bond between the two of you. Narrate what you’re cooking or what you’re doing in the moment.
Take a look in the mirror. Your body is growing another human being and that is hard work! Appreciate what your body does for you each day. Even movements like standing up, bending over, or walking down the stairs - it’s doing it for two.
During Postpartum
When your baby arrives earthside, it doesn’t mean that it’s automatically easier to be present now that they’re with you. In some ways, it’s even more difficult to stay present because you’re likely tired, trying to figure out parenting, and navigating a new way of life.
While you might find yourself feeling excited about the next phase and thinking, “Oh I can’t wait for…” what if you instead found the magic of the phase that they are presently in? Chances are, while a new skill your baby learns can unlock a new part of your journey together, you’ll later look back and miss what used to be.
Here’s my favorite way to recenter my attention with my baby. I call this a baby sensory walk:
Look down at your baby and take in as many small details as you can about them. Start at their head and work down to their feet.
Notice how it feels to be touching them, which parts of your skin are touching, and how the fabric they’re wearing feels in your hands.
Listen to the sounds your baby is making between their breaths, grunts, and coos.
Sniff your baby to elicit an oxytocin rush in your body.
To end this sensory walk, take in all of the senses of your baby at the same time. This is not only grounding for you, but it requires your brain to actively work on noticing what’s happening in the present moment.
You’re Not Alone
If you feel your mind wandering and you’re having trouble staying in the present, you’re not alone. I love to remind mamas about this fact: thousands of years ago monks had “monkey mind” and life back then was far less stimulating as it is present day. If they had trouble focusing on one thought, how are you expecting yourself to only have one thought at a time?
Now here’s the biggest takeaway I’d like to you take from this post:
The key to being present is not only focusing on one thought at a time, or even only focusing on your “positive” thoughts. The best way to be present is to acknowledge all thoughts as they all are a part of who we are. Sometimes, just the act of acknowledging a thought is enough to clear it from our minds.
If this is something you need more practice with, join our prenatal & postpartum yoga in Connecticut! We offer pregnancy-safe yoga, meditation, & other wellness services. Both in-person & virtual classes available.
